4.09.2011

A Milestone

After a somewhat disappointing February, March was ultimately a turn-around. And so far, April has been great. Of course, I now have some added motivation. A high school girlfriend and I have decided to go on vacation this summer, and most likely to Cancun. I don't just want to be "okay" in a swimsuit, I want to be confident in a swimsuit. So I've buckled back down on my eating habits, which was what had gotten away from me. Today I had to go clothes shopping. Yes, had to. I have several gigs coming up and my concert black is all too big. Two years ago, I had enough concert black to go a 5-performance gig with only re-wearing the same pants once. Now, I don't have ANY concert black that actually fits. Off to the mall I went. While I was there, I perused Easter dresses as well. This'll be the first Easter in several years where I'll be at a church and where I won't be wearing a choir robe the entire time. In the Women's section, someone had accidentally restocked a 16 misses with the Women's dresses -- same basic cut, same designer. I took both the 16 and a 16W into the dressing room. (Mind you, there was a 3" difference between the two!) The 16 actually fit. I ended up trying on a 14W blazer, which fit but was a bit snug. I then went into new territory. After decades of shopping in plus size sections, being able to shop in the misses departments is uncharted territory. I discovered, at least at this store, that 14W was equal to a little smaller than an 18 misses. Go figure. I headed down to a well-known national plus-sized women's store. For a brief period during my MM, I was able to fit into a 14-16 at this store. To be more honest, I managed to get into 14-16 things, and did wear a pair of size 16 jeans from there. Today, I put on a 14 fitted jacket -- something I've never been able to do there -- and buttoned it. I opted for a 16 simply because I need it for tomorrow and it would be more comfortable for sitting down after I'd lost about 5 or 10 more pounds. I'm beginning to enter the expensive part of weight loss. Bras, underwear are at the point where I need to replace them. My skinniest clothes are gradually getting to be too big. I'm pulling dresses and summer clothes out of my closet that I haven't worn in a couple years only to make them work with belts and then ultimately relegate them to my "donate" piles. I own no shorts other than workout shorts that fit. T-shirts and tank tops are fine oversized. Pants that threaten to fall off if you sneeze or move wrong, not so much. I think I can now officially say I'm the smallest I've ever been in my adult life. I lost a lot of weight prior to starting my MM, but I wasn't into misses sizes. I was happy to eke into a 16W. I went through another weight loss two years later, back into the same range and the aforementioned 14-16s. Then I went on Prednizone. Then I did additional graduate studies. Then for many other reasons, I ultimately ballooned up to a 22, in some cases a 24W. So this is a milestone that has boosted my ego. I still have 65 pounds to go, give or take. At 70+ pounds lost, I'm just over halfway there. Next goal: under the 200 mark.

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